Monologues4Kids

Gerrie will write Custom Monologues to order!

An Original Custom Monologue will help you stand out from the crowd.

“Own the Moment”

More information here.

"I can’t find him.  I’ve looked everywhere.  I don’t know what else to do.  (say passionately)  Rowdy, where are you? . . . . . . . ." 

" . . . . I went blackberry picking with my family and picked so many berries.  (scrunch nose) I also ate most of them, but they were looking at me and I think I heard one of them say (change voice to sound inviting) “Take a bite.”  (shrug)  I was taste testing. . . . . "

"I’m a mermaid.  You can’t tell because I have legs.  (wobble a little as you gesture at your legs).  Ariel has a potion mermaids can drink and be human for a day.  It’s so much fun. . . . AND I can walk to the ice cream store.  (say ice cream in a dreamy, blissful voice) Ice cream.   I love being a mermaid but sometimes being a human is great too."  

"I just watched a TikTok from someone called “Betty Sue” who is telling kids (use southern accent if possible) “Dirt is good.  (touch face with finger at different spots) A little dirt here, a little dirt there; it adds shadow and contour.  So let’s git dirty.”  (Unbelieving wide-eyed shock, shaking head a little)  Unbelievable.  Here are (gesture at self) my skin care tips . . . . . "

" . . . . But everyone else says pink is boring.  They say pink is a baby color.  They say I should like red because it’s (make voice exciting as you say) dramatic.  Or I should like purple because it’s (make voice cool) cool.  I tried . . . . "

" . . . .The new baby at my house spends all his time screaming and (scrunch up face as if smelling something disgusting) making incredibly stinky diapers. (fling arms out angrily)  Why do we need a new baby anyway? . . . . "

" . . . .She started screaming (yell like the sister)  “FROG! Get it off, get it off.” (Make a terrified face like the sister) And then she ran away screaming that frog feet touched her and she will never be clean again. (giggle)  It was pretty fun. (tilt head to one side) . . . "

"Dear Tooth Fairy.  Today I lost my first tooth.  My Mommy said that if put my tooth under my pillow, you would give me a dollar.  (Place letter in a pocket and put hands on hips with attitude)  A dollar?  Can’t you do better than that? ....."  

"Mommy said we had to move again.  I miss our home.  (smile) There were trees everywhere.  Now we live in apartments.  (shake head sadly)  No trees.  So I decided to make a sand castle of our home in the sandbox . . . . .)

" . . . . . Humans! They’re so needy. Always picking me up.  (very dramatic) I need my space!  And please do not eat a chocolate rabbit in front of me. (eyes wide with horror as you shudder)  Those poor bunnies.  Eaten alive! . . . . . "

"Dear Julissa. Do you like your new home? I hope you’re making lots of new friends. (Pause and voice starts to break) I hope . . . I hope . . . .  No. (tear paper in half) No, I don’t hope that! (tear paper again and let pieces fall to floor) . . ."

"He’s outside the window again.  Every day he says:  “Come away, come away to  the Neverland.”  I want to say yes. (look conflicted)  Mother says I must grown up. . . . . " 

" . . . . Not only does my Mom have a new husband but now she has a brand new daughter to pay attention to. (undertone of anger)  I hate my stepsister already. They’ll probably get her new clothes and new toys and I’ll get the ratty old things. . . . . . . . "

" . . . . And Chinlee can tap dance. (look impressed)  I have no idea how her feet go so fast.  So we’re a little different, but we’re mostly the same.  Why does anyone care what color we are? . . .  ."

" . . . Well, no that’s not true.  If you kiss Farley, he turns into a Prince.  And Deena’s not really an ugly duckling; she’s a swan.  So we’re a little different. . . . . "

"I'm doomed.  My Dad is going away on a business trip.  He’s going to be gone for two weeks.  My Mom told me that means that now I'm the man of the house.  Me? (grab chest with both hands) Do I have to take over everything my Dad does?  . . . . . "

" . . . . Yea, I know the Superhero always wins in the end.  (put hand or finger up when you say but) BUT the Supervillain always comes back.  (spread arms) There’s always a sequel. . . . . "

" . . . . Dear parents: looking at videos of water slides, (put arms up mockingly) even with surround sound, is not as much fun as actually (shouting in frustration with fists clenched) GOING ON A WATER SLIDE.  These are my prime childhood years and I’m wasting them online.  . . . "

"Please don’t be mad at me Toto.  I thought our friends from Oz would like to visit Kansas.  (Look around wide-eyed)  Who knew Munchkins were such hooligans? . . . . . "

"Attention Kids of the World!  Are you bored?  I know I am.  There’s no school - yea! There’s no camp - boo! And I’ve already watched EVERYTHING on TV.  I bet you have too.  That means it’s time to watch me on Tik Tok . . . . "

" . . . .At first I thought it was cool to have my own dragon, (concerned) but things are getting weird. He keeps asking for candy because it turns out (spread arms in an unbelieving way) dragons are addicted to sugar. And he’s starting to look at me funny. He said he wants a sheep for dinner or else. (worried) I’m not sure what “or else” means . . . . . ."

"They call me a foster kid now.  But I had a family.  (small smile) A Mom, Dad and a little brother named Max.  (look confused)  But . . .  there was an accident.  . . . . . "

" . . . . How do they expect me to function without the internet?  (roll eyes)  It's like living in the Dark Ages. (raise hand and wave) Hello Counselor person.  We have a problem . . . "

"I’m so mad!  My family is impossible.  (whine)  Why are they ruining my life?  . . . . .  Maybe I’m adopted.  Now that would be a great TV episode."  

"Dear Mom and Dad, I think we need a divorce. I’ve tried to be patient. I’ve tried to be hopeful and I’ve watched a lot of Lifetime movies. But nothing is changing. You fight every day. . . . . "  

". . . . Unfortunately the human child I live with (graceful catlike gesture to one side) has become something called (say word dubiously) a “teenager”.  My peaceful domain is now filled with noise and I am constantly being swung about. (Jerk side to side a little as if being swung about) I do NOT approve of this. . . . . . . "

" . . . . I love my Mom and I love animals but they are both ruining my life. We need some rules like NO ANIMALS IN THE SHOWER! Sharing a shower with a gerbil is not fun. . . . . . . . " 

" . . . . . (whining)  What if it’s years before things go back to normal?  And we have to live like this until I’m old and grotty like my grandpa. (eyes widen in horror)  I’ll probably go bald like him.  Yikes! (grab hair)   I don’t want to go bald!  I’m pretty sure I’d look terrible with no hair. . . . . . "

" . . . . .It’s not easy being a couch either. People flopping down on you. Food everywhere. (wincing and scratching a little) I still have Doritos under my left cushion.  . . . . . "

"My older brother is super smart and great in sports. My younger sister is super cute and great in dance. And me?  I’m the kid in the middle who is great in nothing! My grades are average, my sport skills are average, (spread arms wide) my whole life is average. (suddenly thinks of something) . . . . . . . ."

" . . . No I don't want to go to the hospital. (Pleading) Oh won't you please listen?  I was drinking tea and the March Hare was telling a riddle. . . . . Wake up Alice.  Please wake up."

"I’m so lonely.  I go to school, do my homework, watch tv or tiktok.  Then I go to sleep, wake up and do the same things all over again.  (big sigh & then burst out with angrily)  I am so tired of these endless, empty days. . . . . . "

(Actor/Actress is scrolling though phone) I have nothing to post on Instagram today.  (make faces as you look at photos)  Bad angle, this one you can see up my nostrils, giant forehead.  Ewww! . . . . . " 

"I exist.  I know I exist.  But all I feel is black.  I move.  (take a step or two) I know I move.  But all I see is black. . . . . "

"Why am I standing like this? I used to be the featured Mannequin in the Designer Department. (dreamy expression) I wore lovely dresses with beautiful accessories until I was moved here. (say with absolute loathing)  To Juniors.  I hate Juniors!  (Relieved sigh as you slowly straighten up, lowering arms to side as if being moved) . . . . . . . . . . . "

"Every morning at breakfast my Mom asks me how I am.  I always say (smiling, very cool, emphasize the word fine) “I’m fine Mom.  Everything is Fine”.  (Drop smile and eyes become sad and bleak)  I want to say my ribs hurt Mom, because Seth pushed me against my locker.  . . . . . "

" . . . . My Mom is taking me to Paris.  We're going to museums, monuments (roll eyes) the usual.  But all I want to do is go shoe shopping. (dreamy sigh) I love shoes! . . . ."

" . . . . I’m willing to do anything. (pause and think a second) Well, anything that doesn’t interfere with my life.  I’d have to squeeze it in between school, soccer, and hanging with my friends. . . . . "

" . . . . . Yes I'm dying. . . .  I want my sassy body back in the Afterlife. I plan to date some aliens or maybe go white water rafting on Neptune. No sitting around on a cloud for me. . ."